It's cool to meet new people who know me only as Michael Blumental. For others the change is quite hard to swallow and I still have to correct friends and acquaintances when they refer to me as "Bregman". Heck, I even have to stop myself as well when I find myself typing my old name.
I guess to some extent I'll always be Mickey Bregman to myself as well. It's not that I don't like that name or anything. I consider changing my name to be a little sacrifice as it was such a huge part of my identity, but I am certainly growing into my new name and getting used to it already. At least I get to keep the same initials which is convenient as I sign most of my emails with them.
The reason I changed my name is simple: our children. I know many couples, gay or straight, adorn their children with a double-barrelled name. I don't knock it, it's still a fair solution and some names actually sound quite good when paired together. But Blumental-Bregman or Bregman-Blumental sound absolutely horrible. A bit too law firmish. Our kids are going to have enough unique issues to deal with, better at least spare them from having this spelling nightmare for the rest of their lives. What I always wonder is, what happens when two people with double-barrelled names meet and marry? Do they give their children a quaruple-barrelled name? At some point you will have to trim the fat. The simpe fact is, I don't think the actual name really matters that much. A rose by any other name blah blah blah.
Anyway, there wasn't really any other solution. We both planned to have at least one biological child each... So then what? They'll have different last names? It will totally fragment the family and is probably the worst possible solution we could think of.
And then it hit me. I'll just take my husband's name and we will all be unified under the Blumental name. My older brother can be in charge of manufacturing little Bregmans. My mother voiced her disappointed with the choice and I pointed out to her that she wasn't always a Bregman, she also changed her name. My brother teased me that I was "being the woman" and my reaction was "so?". I genuinely don't see "being the woman" as a bad thing. What's good enough for generation upon generation of women (including my mother and grandmothers) is good enough for me.
We are the Blumentals. Hear us roar!
--Mickey
P.S
The actual process of changing my name is a whole different matter. Passports, driving license, national health insurance, credit cards, national insurance, pension, tax office, bank account... Going through that process again is reason enough for me not to divorce anytime soon!
I guess to some extent I'll always be Mickey Bregman to myself as well. It's not that I don't like that name or anything. I consider changing my name to be a little sacrifice as it was such a huge part of my identity, but I am certainly growing into my new name and getting used to it already. At least I get to keep the same initials which is convenient as I sign most of my emails with them.
The reason I changed my name is simple: our children. I know many couples, gay or straight, adorn their children with a double-barrelled name. I don't knock it, it's still a fair solution and some names actually sound quite good when paired together. But Blumental-Bregman or Bregman-Blumental sound absolutely horrible. A bit too law firmish. Our kids are going to have enough unique issues to deal with, better at least spare them from having this spelling nightmare for the rest of their lives. What I always wonder is, what happens when two people with double-barrelled names meet and marry? Do they give their children a quaruple-barrelled name? At some point you will have to trim the fat. The simpe fact is, I don't think the actual name really matters that much. A rose by any other name blah blah blah.
Anyway, there wasn't really any other solution. We both planned to have at least one biological child each... So then what? They'll have different last names? It will totally fragment the family and is probably the worst possible solution we could think of.
And then it hit me. I'll just take my husband's name and we will all be unified under the Blumental name. My older brother can be in charge of manufacturing little Bregmans. My mother voiced her disappointed with the choice and I pointed out to her that she wasn't always a Bregman, she also changed her name. My brother teased me that I was "being the woman" and my reaction was "so?". I genuinely don't see "being the woman" as a bad thing. What's good enough for generation upon generation of women (including my mother and grandmothers) is good enough for me.
We are the Blumentals. Hear us roar!
--Mickey
P.S
The actual process of changing my name is a whole different matter. Passports, driving license, national health insurance, credit cards, national insurance, pension, tax office, bank account... Going through that process again is reason enough for me not to divorce anytime soon!
1 comment:
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